warning:serious moany bitch

We are not having a very auspicious start to the day.

I went to bed early last night as I had stomach cramps and indigestion and was just exhausted. The aforementioned symptoms may have been a result of the litre and a half of grapefruit juice I drank yesterday in one of my more misguided pregnancy craving moments (mm, mental note to self…….).Then poor crazypixie, the teething monster, went on a boob binge from 2 til 6.

This morning I arrived down to a manky kitchen, and himself all apologetic. I hung out the nappies and put on a wash only then to discover that my wedding and engagement rings were no longer on my hand (they have been very loose of late). Cue tears, followed by himself using his powers of deduction to work out that they were in the washing machine and then successfully retrieving them from a soapy heap of wet clothes.

Crazypixie has been demented with teething pain (four molars on the way), has a snotty nose (the one that usually augers a really decent cold) and was due to get her MMR today. We put that off for another day after she vomited up her breakfast (all over the cream carpet, need I add).

It was then time to call in the troops. Wonderful sis, elfenpants, arrived to hold baby as I cleaned up the vomit. While knee deep in pre-digested porridge and sultanas I got two phone calls, one that a friend of my parents had passed away and the other that my 34 week pregnant friend is in hospital being monitored for pre-eclampsia.

Ah well at least it’s not raining……………………..

Half assed parenting

Crazypixie always starts the day beautifully clean from the preceding evening’s bath and dressed in a colour co-ordinated outfit. I carry her down to the clean kitchen and after breakfast we open her toy box and take some toys onto the rug.
By the time himself gets home from work however, she is usually just in vest and top, trousers have either been covered in banana, pee, unidentifiable muck or a combination of all three, and sure there is no point replacing them a few hours before bedtime. Her face has usually taken on an orange tinge by this stage too from whatever tomato based product she ate and her hair has been fashionable styled with the now familiar mixture of porridge and yoghurt.
The kitchen looks like something from Gordon Ramsey’s worst nightmare and the living room like Santa’s workshop after a week of work to rule by elves when the cleaning staff was on strike.
As for mummy………well she hands over crazypixie muttering that her nappy may need changing and collapses with a cup of tea in front of the PC to catch up with all her virtual friends.
That night order is restored and preparations are made for the following day’s activities.

A fairly typical day for a stay at home mum you may say, but why do I feel it could be better?

I enthusiastically start each day like the New Year, full of plans and optimism but things seem to deteriorate as evening approaches. Now, we usually have great fun together, eat well and generally have what I’d consider a good day. It’s just that some inner bitch is always there to remonstrate with me for finishing my cup of tea instead of changing a dirty nappy immediately, for heading out for a walk with crazypixie on her bike instead of doing the mornings wash up or lurking online instead of catching up with the ironing during nap time. It may be the catholic upbringing, the feminine mystique, that particularly Irish ‘what would the neighbours think’, or my own very well developed sense of inadequacy that has me at my low points questioning my parenting abilities.
Thankfully I have a wonderful husband, family and friends who are very forgiving of my shortcoming, and most of all I have a very happy daughter.
I think the way forward is to embrace the chaos as being part of happy family life, and to stop putting pressure on myself to be the ultimate domestic goddess, perfect parent, successful woman, sex goddess, and all round superwoman.
Ok, that’s enough of that……….I’m going to hang out on the floor with himself and crazypixie for an hour and I may even go to bed early without doing any ironing, washing or baking…..

yippee a poo...

Mammydiaries has whupped my ass into posting. Pregnancy laziness has been setting in……mmm couch and comfort food……
Anyhoo, for the updates:
The sleep plan is seriously working (or it may have nothing to do with our efforts at all, who knows). Crazypixie spent the entire night in her cot and himself and I spent it in our bed, oh the little pleasures…………..
As for operation pee-pee, we had a breakthrough there too. Well more like mummy managed to spot a poo in progress and got crazypixie onto the loo in time for the first performance. Well if anyone had seen me dancing around singing my new composition ‘poo-poo down the loo’ I’d surely have been locked up (did I mention my needing to get out more often?)
So, ‘tis all go here.
Was also at the gp today, the one who thinks I’m bonkers to be breastfeeding while pregnant, and all is well with the littlespud. Roll on the summer and baby chaos!!
Now must get my ass in gear tonight and do a bit of work on the new website……more of that anon.

Happy mothering sunday...

I love being a mum.
It’s my first mother’s day as a mother!! I missed it by 2 days last year. Forgive me if I get a little maudlin and teary eyed.
I’ve done some pretty rewarding work in my time and held a lot of responsible roles, but nothing compares to being a mum.
I love to watch my daughter as she plays away, oblivious to my parental eye. I see her gentle nature emerge as she cuddles dolly and plays with our cats, I admire her adventurous spirit as heads, tentatively at first and then with great determination, up the stairs for the first time and then later out the front door into the garden. I feel privileged to see her wonder as she learns how to interact with this world of ours.
The enormity of emotion I feel when she turns to me for comfort or reassurance is beyond words and I really do treasure our days together.
Anyhoo, enough of that self indulgence, the nappies won’t wash themselves………

yet more cunning plans.....

Well, ‘the plan’ is progressing well. She was asleep by 7:30 last night and didn’t wake once until 12:30, then had a bit of restless patch but was easily settled (magic human soother that I am) and the alarm roused her at 7. We’re definitely on the right track

Operation pee-pee is in its second phase now too. Phase one was mostly ‘look mummy’s doing a pee-pee’ or ‘are you doing a poo-poo? Good girl that’s a poo-poo’ phase two involves actually encouraging her to pee-pee and poo-poo on the toilet. We’ve got one of those little padded seats for her precious tooshie and a range of reading material that we explore while waiting for the big event. No results yet but she’s very happy sitting on the loo chatting with me so it’s only a matter of timing I reckon. I’ve noticed she disappears into a corner to produce her number twos so I’m being vigilant for the opportune moment. Anyway, we’re in no rush…….as opposed to the sleep issue there is no urgency with operation pee-pee and we’ll just enjoy ourselves!!
And there are people who say I need to get out more often…….

Progress!

We’re slightly less sleepy today. Not the resounding success I’d hoped for (ah the innocent enthusiasm of the first time parent) but a good night nonetheless.
The afternoon nap didn’t go quite as planned. Attempts were interrupted by a poo and after 4 mins of the human soother there was nothing for it but into the car again. Now for crazypixie to fall asleep in the car we need a bit of open road so we can the speed up, so today wasn’t the day to get caught in a funeral, or behind a tractor. As I’d glance back to look for the tell tale sleepy eyelids all I could see was a determined little miss trying to figure out how to get her socks back on…..She feel asleep – eventually, and I caught a few minutes shut eye in my drive (the neighbours already think we’re nuts).
So all was relatively on track until after dinner when I went to grab a quick shower while himself looked after his darling daughter. Now you would think just before bedtime might not be the best time for playing drums, building camps and jumping around to the smurfs theme tune. My husband is a very intelligent man but sometimes I could just cry…..
This was followed by the now really wound up crazypixie running laps of the bath and pouncing on duckies. Then there was pyjama wrestling, book frisbie and, my favourite, another forty minutes of the human soother.
Eventually I came down stairs and told himself he could wind her down. Half an hour later himself was very contrite and poor crazypixie was crying with tiredness. So I settled her down – two hours later than ‘the plan’ and with mummy quite close to tears at this stage.
Himself took the 11 to 4 shift again and apparently had no worries settling her quickly the few times she woke (so the poor man won’t fall asleep at his desk again today). I took over gave her a feed, the first since eight thirty I might add and she pretty much nodded off until seven when I got pounced on.
So off we go again today; same plan, but a little less bleary eyed implementing it………….

the latest plan.........

A bit more cheerful today, so no random ranting………
Himself did the 11 to 4 shift last night so I got some sleep – I love that man. We’ve hatched a new cunning plan which involves getting the crazypixie out of bed at 7 and ensuring she gets two naps in. I’m sure this is going to work (though I’ve also been quite sure about every other plan since December)!
So this morning was spent driving around for two hours, firstly to lull the crazypixie to sleep, then to keep her asleep. I made a few attempts at pulling into car parks and catching a bit of shut eye myself but she was well wise to that and was having none of it. I’m sure I’ll be reported to the Gards for suspicious behaviour as I’ve driven through the village at least 6 times already! We’ll attempt the afternoon nap in her room, in the hopes that mummy will get a bit of sleep and not just be a human soother for an hour and a half……
Love the little nutter to bits anyway………

Lá le Pádraig

On this national day I wonder about us, the Irish people. Who are we? What are we about?

Disillusioned as I am with the boys club that passes for our political system, and the way we’ve become so focused on being an economy that we’ve lost sight of ourselves as society, today I’ll look for the positives.

There’s the weather - bear with me on this. It does piss rain a lot, but there is no one who appreciates a sunny day quite like an Irish person. Of course if the sunny spell lasts to long, we’re all wistful for rain again but hey, changeable weather suits us- it keeps conversations going and has us planning for all eventualities.

And there’s…….

Well, there goes that burst of enthusiasm…..

I’m stumped…..

There used to be so many things: the sense of community, the love of family and the Irish mammy, the craic in the local pub, the humour in the face of adversity…..

But sure now we park the about- to-be-repossessed four by four next to the almost paid for extension and nod curtly at neighbours whose names we don’t even know while we busily unpack the kids without the help of grandparents who live two counties away while we look forward to spending the evening working out how to pay the exorbitant mortgage with job cuts looming on the horizon.

Happy St Patricks Day my arse…….

Remember sleep?

My current obsession is sleep. I’m sleep deprived as only a parent can be. Over the last three months we’ve had six teeth cut through, a bout of vomiting bug, two colds and a chest infection. All of which seem to require all night breastfeeding to soothe. Which might be more manageable was I not six months pregnant, but hey, it’s all fun and games. Well actually the crazy pixie appears to think so. It is very difficult to convince a happily adventuring baby that 3 in the morning in a very unsociable hour for shrieking at the cats or chasing mummy to the bathroom.

Tonight the puzzle gets more complex; she’s fed, appears well, went to sleep at her bedtime, had her nap today and yet has woken every 20 minutes since going down. She’s obviously distressed and we can’t figure out why – not being able to understand her needs is so difficult……I can only imagine how frustrating it must be for her.

Now there are those who say a night or so of crying it out will sort the problem, but that’s not the parenting path we’ve chosen. ‘Trust is more important than sleep’ is my mantra which, I admit, does occasionally ring hollow after another bleary eyed night. Venting does help (thank you blogosphere, and very patient friends), and at least himself is superbly supportive and appreciative of my efforts.

And as for tomorrow morning………….well, she’ll be bright as a button and raring to go as she attempts to drag mummy out of bed by the ears. That’s my girl……..

Baby Babble

Resurrecting the ole blog isn’t as easy as it first seemed.

Maybe it’s pregnancy or just hanging out with a one year old all day, but clarity of thought eludes me…….I’m afraid it’ll probably be rambling baby focused sentimentality for the next year or two. There’s nothing for it but to embrace it…..It’s not as if I had much of consequence to contribute in my former existence anyway...well besides the whole peeing in the wellie incident.

Roll on the baby babble…….

The dead arose and appeared to many.....

Yes, I dropped off the face of the planet.......There were things I couldn't even share in cyberspace...........I abandoned the blog world and retreated into my shell!

And here is why:
The last time I posted was just after finding out I was pregnant, didn't let the secret out though, and then had a scan which seemed to indicate we'd miscarry........

Then followed a tense few months.......

Anyhoo........more than a year and a half later we have a wonderful one year old crazy pixie and number two is on the way in June.

And the novel....well let's say it's on the back burner for now while other cunning plans are underway....